Tag: blog

বৃষ্টি নাকি ঝড় বিলাস?

আমি থাকি San Diego, California তে। গত দুদিন ধরে খুব ঝোড় হাওয়া বইছে। Southern California তে বৃষ্টি প্রায় হয়না বললেই চলে। যা একটু হয় তাও আবার শীতের সময়। তাই এইখানে মানুষ কিছুটা বৃষ্টির জন্য অপেক্ষা করে থাকে। সেই বৃষ্টিও খুব মুশল ধারে বৃষ্টি না, অল্প কিছুটা হয়ে শীতের পরিমাণটা বাড়িয়ে দেয়।

আমি Los Angeles county তে থাকতাম বহুদিন। কইদিন Northern California তেও থেকেছি। আমার মতে San Diego র মত এত আরামদায়ক আবহাওয়া পুরো যুক্ত রাষ্ট্রে নেই। বছরে বেশির ভাগ সময় ঝকঝকে রোদেলা আকাশ, নিরমল আরদ্রতাহীন বাতাস। কিন্তু সমুদ্রের কাছে হওয়ায় রৌদ্রের তীব্রতা নাই। আর পাহাড়, সুন্দর সমুদ্র সৈকতের অনন্য একটি জায়গা।

আমি ক্যালিফোর্নিয়াতে বেশ আরামেই আছি। আসল শীত কি কখনও বুঝিনি। শুধু বাংলাদেশের আবহাওয়ার যেই জিনিষটা খুব মিস করি তা হল বৃষ্টি।

তো যাইহোক। সেই ঝোড় হাওয়া কাল পর্যন্ত বিল্ডিঙের চিপায় চাপায় একধরনের কান্নার মত হুহু শব্দ করছিল। আজকে বিকেল থেকে কিছুটা ঝিরি ঝিরি শীতের বৃষ্টি শুরু হয়েছে। হুহু শব্দের আওয়াজ থেকে মনে পরে গেল বাংলাদেশে আমার কৈশোরের কথা। বাংলা মটর, ইস্কাটন রোডের একটা এপার্টমেন্টে থাকতাম সেই সময়। আমার রুমটা ছিল বিশাল, ঠিক পুরা ফ্ল্যাটের এক কোনায়। দরজাটা বন্ধ করলেই আমার ঘরটা একটা নিজস্ব পৃথিবী হয়ে যেত। একদিকের জানালায় ঘন জঙ্গল আর অন্য জানালায় পাশের লাগোয়া বিল্ডিং দেখা যেত। বাসার সামনেই ব্যাস্ত রাস্তা। অথচ আমার ঘর থেকে যানজটের গাড়িঘোড়ার শব্দ শোনা  যেত না। পাশের জঙ্গলে আম, কাঁঠাল সহ অনেক ধরনের গাছ। মাঝে মাঝে বুনো বেড়াল, বেজি ইত্যাদিও দেখা যেত। প্রচণ্ড বাতাসে আমার ঘরের দরজা স্বশব্দে বন্ধ হয়ে যেত প্রায়ই। তাই সবসময় একটা ছোট টুল দিয়ে দরজা ঠেকা দিয়ে রাখতে হত। মাঝে মাঝে মধ্য রাতে মনে হত বাতাস আমার দরজার নব মুচড়ে খোলার চেষ্টা করছে। এটা কীভাবে সম্ভব? কি ভুতুরে ব্যাপার! আমি ঐ সময় একটু আধ্যাত্মিক টাইপ ছিলাম। যেই সময় মানুষ বাইরে হইচই করে, আমি দরজা বন্ধ করে ঝড় বৃষ্টি উপভগ করতাম, আর কুরান, শুনীলের ঐতিহাসিক উপন্যাশ, ভূতের বই, বিজ্ঞানের বই আরও বহু জিনিশ পড়তাম।

যখন ঝড় হত তখন বাতাস সেই জঙ্গল আর বিল্ডিঙের চিপায় ঠিক একি রকম হুহু কান্নার আওয়াজ করত। আজ সম্পূর্ণ ভিন্ন জায়গায় বসে পুরানো দিনের কিছু কথা মনে পরে গেল।

 

The Quickest Way To Make a Lame Decision

I have written lengthy posts about Life Hack Tips: When you should NOT make a big decision and Life Hack Tips: HOW To Make Good Decisions.

But those are for serious life changing scenarios. How do you make small decisions on a daily basis? The kind of decisions which perhaps do not change the outcome of your life but you still end up spending quite a bit of time pondering over them, such as- what you are going to wear for an occasion, what movie are you going to watch and what you are going to eat for the dinner? Something really unimportant yet important.

You might be shaking your head-“why is this even a blog post?” But trust me I see people being indecisive and fighting over small things to come up with a quick decision.

Okay, now I hate to make lengthy posts especially when it is something insignificant. This is how I take a lame decision, “drum roll” please:

fruitmachine

I go to this website: “Fruit Machine” and I write my options and run the fruit-machine for three times, whichever comes the most is usually my choice. People also use the method of flipping a coin. Whatever works for you. The main goal is to know what you “really” want. You don’t always have to follow what the result is. For example, I was trying to make a choice between what to eat for lunch- Indian or Mexican food? Indian food came twice but I figured out I was actually leaning more towards Mexican Food that day. Pretty Lame right!? But it saved me time to decide where I want to go for lunch.

What the SHORT STORIES are missing in blogs

Not just in blogs but anywhere, storytelling is an art. Not many people are good at it-particularly at short story telling.

I have read a lot of stories in blogs from a lot of aspiring authors. Number one thing that I miss is called the “content”.  At one time I was reading a story after following a link, the author is probably trying to imply that he has great vocabulary.  He pretty much used uncommon words wherever he could. Majority of the readers would need the help of a dictionary for every word that he used-thus feeling lost in finding the meaning of the words but not being able to see the whole story itself.

Another time, I found a very smooth kind of writing style. In fact, the words had such a nice zen like flow that I forgot I was reading a story, I thought it was poetry. When I reached the bottom, I found out actually there was no story line and in fact the author went off-topic.

When we write novels, I think details are important. But when we write “short stories” we should be able to give a high level perspective-the larger picture of the plot without driving readers away in opposite directions.

And please, no one reads long posts and posts which are too difficult to read. This is a fact. Keep it simple with an easy flow, while building up the content of your story gradually, so that it hooks the readers from the beginning till the end.

Thanks.

Life Hack Tips: HOW To Make Good Decisions

Previously I have posted an article about when we should avoid making important life decisions. If you have not read it, then check this out:

Life Hack Tips: When you should NOT make a big decision (by Tasnia Ponkti)

As I promised there, I am writing a follow-up article on “how” to make good decisions in life. It is going to be a long post, so bear with me. These are the 7 vital steps to make good decisions in life:

1. Know what you want in your life:

Some people find it really difficult to figure out exactly what they want in life. Everyone should have an underlying constitution in their life. What do I mean by that? The Constitution does not change very often with every small change. So your personal values should not change with every step that you take in your life.know

For example, let us think about career options. Well, what kind of person are you? What really hooks you when you think about career planning? Is it money, fame, honor, wisdom or is it power? Do not do something because the rest of society is doing it or your family and peers want you to do it.

2. Do your own research:

It is important to be resourceful and informative before making a decision. This is related to the previous point. My mother says, “In order to know what you don’t know, you must know something.” It is important to ask the right questions. How do you start asking the right questions? By knowing your available options and gathering information about those options. Evaluate the pros and cons of a decision.

research_teaching2.jpg

For example,  I frequently answer this type of question on Quora. People ask questions like what are the minimum requirements of a certain university in a certain department? The real answer is, it should already be listed on that university’s official website. That is where doing your own research and gathering basic information comes into play.  Now suppose you are deciding your options of attending colleges and you have already been selected into a handful of them. Now how do you make the final decision? In no particular order, the aspects would be major/field, educational value, the rank of the school, ROI (return of investments i.e the current prospects of alumni), cost of attendance and cost of living in the area, weather, vibe and atmosphere of the campus, professors rating, etc. Note that you have to re-arrange these options based on your priority and you also need to physically tour the campus to make your decision.

3.Seek an expert’s opinion/help:

It is more like seeking experts and experienced people’s opinions, but at the end of the day make your own decision. Whether it is about education or renting/buying a house, or starting a new career (I have found from my personal experience that) sometimes there are options available beyond what people think they know. Everyone’s advice is somewhat subjective based on their own experience or personal hidden motives but still, it is important to ask the same question to many people around to get different perspectives and honest criticism. From my harsh personal experience, I have faced many discouragements and many rejections, and sometimes heavy criticism from people including closed ones. Whether it was about moving to a new place or applying to a more competitive university or a job- I heard a lot of “no”s because people thought I simply did not have what it takes. That is when my own resourcefulness came in handy. I still kept trying via different options and finally got what I wanted.expert.png

Another thing I have learned, just because someone thinks they are the expert or spent some time in a given career field, does not necessarily mean they can correctly predict everything about a new career option. Which means sometimes there are just no experts and you become your own expert. Have you ever read the monkey’s story? Sometimes people also discourage because they think you cannot do it, as they have never done it or they just don’t want you to do it. So if you are pursuing something very ambitious, keep your ultimate goal to yourself, while you still seek advice from different people. Take advice but do not get persuaded by one-sided strong opinions.

4.  Think rationally but do not over-analyze situations:

While it is important to think rationally and seek different views from people, there are certain things in life we tend to make worse, when we over-analyze. Especially when it comes to selecting a partner for a long-term relationship. Trust your instinct or gut feeling. If you have doubts about a certain person, chances are there is something wrong. Our intuition is a gift to us, so it is better to use it when it is required. It is important to listen effectively, observe people and situation analytically. We have to use a balance of rationality and intuition in most cases. There is nothing wrong with being emotional but it needs to be in check.

rationally.jpg

5. Take action:

Now that you have researched all your options, asked for advice, thought about critically using your best judgment, narrowed down to your final decision about what you want in your life-finally it is time to simply just do it. This is the hardest part for many of us. With the advent of the internet and so many online resources, we sometimes spend a lot of time trying to find a solution but somehow still put the final action on hold. Chances are, if you are reading this, you are doing it as well.

action-changes-things

For example, I have spent some time thinking about blogging. Like many of you, I searched many online posts about how to blog, top topics to blog, how to make money by blogging…blah blah, etc. Finally, I thought, isn’t it enough that I love to write as a hobby? And should I just do it for the pure fun of writing and sharing my thoughts? Then I started doing it. Once you start on something, it gets easier to continue even after some initial trials and errors.

6. Be positive, patient and persistent:

Everyone wants to see the result quickly. I was talking about blogging in the previous point. But it’s not just blogging; anything, almost anything good in life, takes time to prosper and grow. Nothing happens overnight. It is really hard to be positive and patient while you are going through a lot in life and want to see the immediate results. Persistence is a whole new level of skill which transforms an ordinary newbie into a successful expert in the field. I have seen many intelligent people lack this skill, which reminds me that persistence is more important than talent or intelligence to succeed in life.

 Be-Positive-Patient-And-Persistent.jpg

For example, suppose you are looking for a job in your career and have sent hundreds and thousands of applications. You are unemployed or under-employed for a long time. It is hard for you to smile with positivity and act like you are fine while deep down you are feeling the burning of financial stress every moment. No matter how hard the battle gets, keep doing what you’re doing. Keep tweaking your process. If you are sending so many applications and receiving no interview calls, chances are, you are desperately trying almost anything and not what you are really good at. Narrow down your job search based on your field of specialization and your area of interest. Do not send the same generic resume/CV everywhere. People talk about networking so much these days. What is it really? It is about finding the right-minded people in your career who will guide and champion you to your next career destination. Find those people and keep sharing your goals and ideas with them. I personally got into places just by having a conversation about my ideas.

7. Accept the failure and keep moving on:

Did I mention trial and error in one of my previous points? One of the biggest tests of patience is accepting failure and keep going. The reason why we spend so much time seeking answers and not taking action is that we fear failure. Learn from yours and others’ mistakes, make the changes you need to make in your approach and no matter what happens, keep moving on. Never change your goal but be ready to change your methods to reach it. Never stop. You never know how close you are to your destination. I have seen many people giving up when they were very close to reaching their goals. Remember, the final few steps are always harder.

fail.jpg

Note that numbers 5, 6 & 7 are part of being a farm in the decision.

Thanks for reading.